One Big Update... The Highlight Reel

OK, so lots has happened since I posted last. So hang onto your laptops, this will be a whirlwind of an update.

First, we moved into our new house at the end of April. We are loving the new space. Of course with the revolving door of kids we've had lately I'm already dreaming of our dream house we are wanting to build. Rooms, rooms, rooms! Never enough around here!

So about all of those kids. We have been really busy around here. The weekend after we moved in we had a newborn who left after 3 days. A few days later we did respite for another foster family. The day she left we got a call for twin girls that stayed for a couple weeks. When the twins went home we got our little "I" who will probably be here through the summer. He is a 9 month old sumo baby. And totally adorable. On Memorial Day we got another newborn who was here only overnight. Then 2 brothers came for almost a week.

In all of that time C has some pretty serious stuff happen in his case. At one point it looked like he might be moved to another home, but thankfully the judge saw how tough that would be for him and he stayed. Right now things are really up in the air and we aren't sure what direction his case will take.
Then there is baby A. Her case has also taken a huge turn. It seems like her mother is wanting to sign consent to adopt. Im trying to not get my hopes up. And I feel really bad for her mom who feels like she can't  give A what she needs. Like everything else in foster care we just have to see where this road takes us.

Moving On and Moving Out

This week I had to say goodbye to the first and so far only baby I've ever got to bring home from the hospital. It was emotional to say the least. I know she is in a great place and I know she will be loved beyond measure, but why not me? Yes it was our choice to not be her forever family, but really it was God's choice. I keep wondering why we've been at this foster care thing, just hoping to adopt, yet no one "sticks". And here the one kid who was a guaranteed as guaranteed can be with foster care wasn't "the one". God what do you have planned? I'd love to know. I honestly know it's going to be perfect and exactly what I need, but I'm beginning to tap my foot with impatience. Lord, help me wait on You!!

I guess in the great scheme of things it's good that she moved when she did. We've decided our little rental is too small for our ever fluctuating brood, and we've found a new place. Albeit another temporary place... (until we BUILD!! or find house perfection) So now I am starting to pack and plan with only 3 kids in tow. Not too bad. Last time around I had 4 and a MIA hubby who had already come to the land of the cornfields for work.
New house means shopping and decorating, so that makes me happy. I might be posting lots of pictures soon for house ideas. So be prepared!

Some Things I'll Never Understand

This past month has been just plain unpredictable and chaotic. We've had some great moments, but I have to say seeing January pass by leaves me relieved and ready for a new day!

Ryan and I both had birthdays and for the first time in a long time we got a night out with NO KIDS! It was nice, strange, but nice! I think we need to do that more.

My big girl had a hard time this month. Living away from family really takes a toll on her. Christmas and spending a few days with family brought up all those sad/mad feelings and it took a few weeks to get her in check. I so wish I could make things better for her on many levels, but she has to want to let go of her anger and to be honest, she just doesn't want to. Breaks my mommy heart!

We still have our 3 little people. Same ones... can you believe it? Lots of changes happening there. we've had visits with bios, no visits, back to visits, 1 with visits - 2 without, and now we are close to no visits. It will definately lighten my load, but I find myself getting frustrated at the lack of effort some parents are making to see or regain custody of their child. I will NEVER understand not choosing to jump through whatever hoop is put before me or not taking every opportunity to spend even a second holding my child. I try my best to empathize. They are coming from a very different place - one that seems hopeless. And sometimes so caught up in other things that they don't even see the skewed priorities, so I don't judge, but I also can't truly understand.
Less visits has lightened the load and that is a good thing, because we are now adding 3 therapy appointments to the week. OT and PT are on the roster for some of our little bits. And we some important doctors appointments coming up that I'd appreciate prayers for.
We are also praying about what happens if these kids don't get to go back to their parents. Lots to consider and we really are needing things to move in just the right way. Sorry for the cryptic-ness, but some things you know I just can't share.

Last weekend we had a nice weekend away - minus 2 babies who had a great time with friends. We joined another family and had some fun at the Great Wolf Lodge. It's been awhile since we'd been there. This time Pooka Girlie was able to ride anything she wanted. She had a blast! So did the rest of us, even though Ryan says he's old now and couldn't ride the slides because of his back. He got toddler duty!

The big thing on our horizon is our house hunt. With 4 kids (and possibly getting ready to open up for another... shhh!) we are quickly running out of space. I swear I feel like I am drowning in laundry and I do it EVERY day. We need space to spread out and not trip over baby gear and toddler toys. Not to mention homeschooling materials and Littlest Pet Shop. My organizational freak side want to purge it all or buy stock in Rubbermaid and box it all up, but it's all "needed" stuff, so I fight the urge and say let's MOVE!