Some Things I'll Never Understand

This past month has been just plain unpredictable and chaotic. We've had some great moments, but I have to say seeing January pass by leaves me relieved and ready for a new day!

Ryan and I both had birthdays and for the first time in a long time we got a night out with NO KIDS! It was nice, strange, but nice! I think we need to do that more.

My big girl had a hard time this month. Living away from family really takes a toll on her. Christmas and spending a few days with family brought up all those sad/mad feelings and it took a few weeks to get her in check. I so wish I could make things better for her on many levels, but she has to want to let go of her anger and to be honest, she just doesn't want to. Breaks my mommy heart!

We still have our 3 little people. Same ones... can you believe it? Lots of changes happening there. we've had visits with bios, no visits, back to visits, 1 with visits - 2 without, and now we are close to no visits. It will definately lighten my load, but I find myself getting frustrated at the lack of effort some parents are making to see or regain custody of their child. I will NEVER understand not choosing to jump through whatever hoop is put before me or not taking every opportunity to spend even a second holding my child. I try my best to empathize. They are coming from a very different place - one that seems hopeless. And sometimes so caught up in other things that they don't even see the skewed priorities, so I don't judge, but I also can't truly understand.
Less visits has lightened the load and that is a good thing, because we are now adding 3 therapy appointments to the week. OT and PT are on the roster for some of our little bits. And we some important doctors appointments coming up that I'd appreciate prayers for.
We are also praying about what happens if these kids don't get to go back to their parents. Lots to consider and we really are needing things to move in just the right way. Sorry for the cryptic-ness, but some things you know I just can't share.

Last weekend we had a nice weekend away - minus 2 babies who had a great time with friends. We joined another family and had some fun at the Great Wolf Lodge. It's been awhile since we'd been there. This time Pooka Girlie was able to ride anything she wanted. She had a blast! So did the rest of us, even though Ryan says he's old now and couldn't ride the slides because of his back. He got toddler duty!

The big thing on our horizon is our house hunt. With 4 kids (and possibly getting ready to open up for another... shhh!) we are quickly running out of space. I swear I feel like I am drowning in laundry and I do it EVERY day. We need space to spread out and not trip over baby gear and toddler toys. Not to mention homeschooling materials and Littlest Pet Shop. My organizational freak side want to purge it all or buy stock in Rubbermaid and box it all up, but it's all "needed" stuff, so I fight the urge and say let's MOVE!